My very dear friend, Lizzy, was recently rushed to the emergency room after her horse kicked her. She has a ruptured spleen and is in a lot of pain right now. They are waiting for 24 hours to see if it will heal on it’s own, but surgery is likely. The doctors rate her case a 4 out of 5, so it is pretty bad. They are giving her pain medicine but it has failed to give her any relief. Please pray for a speedy recovery and as little pain as possible for her.
I hadn’t posted in a while a few weeks back and when I came to put out my thoughts once again I saw that I had 176 comments. Spam comments. I laughed a couple times as I went page through page of spam. Here are a couple that made me chuckle.
1. Name: buy phentermine online without prescription
Written on post: Tim Hawkins Trailer
Message: “the truth is deeper…”
My reaction: Well, this was a very convincing post and teachs us great morales…uh no. SPAM
The message had absolutely nothing to do with the post, and the name speaks of buying medication for obesity online. Well, if that don’t beat all….
2.) Name: Large Plastic Storage Boxes
Written on post: A Forver Long Post About My Birds and Squirrels
Message: “I found your blog on google and read a few of your other posts. I just added you to my Google News Reader. Keep up the nice work Look forward to reading more from you in the future.”
My reaction: Well punctuation might get him somewhere. And I furthermore feel honored that a Plastic Storage Box commented on my blog. Might be a fer real? Uhh, no. SPAM
3.) Name: Twitter layout
Written on post: The White-a-rooskies and Shopping
Message: “Hey, Awesome blog you have here. I wanted to let you all know that I think Twitter is going to be one of the best networks because of the fact that it is supported by so many industries. I also think when Twitter shows some of it’s new functions, returning traffic will increase to show the real growth of the network.Anyway, I build a site that offerers great resources for Twitter that are 100% free, so come and visit and don’t be a stranger.Keep up the great work!”
My reaction: Apparently twitter is the bomb. And I don’t need to be a stranger when visiting his site that has great twitter layouts, which I obviously need. Umm, could be…no. SPAM
3.) Name: n/a
Written on post: Almost every post
Message:”health insurance quotes 8((( auto insurance pxubq home insurance 129138 life insurance 535666″
My reaction: Well, I got this comment about 50 times with a different name each time. Danny, was one of the names and I was confused for a second because I have a friend named Danny. Well Danny, if that was your comment it wasn’t very convincing or relavant therefore I marked it as SPAM
4.) Name: anxiety therapy
Written on post: WARNING: LOT’S OF GLOBAL WARMING IN PENSICOLA AREA
Message: “Do you suffer by panic disorders? Not a single thing may very well be worse than the terror or worry linked with learning that one could be hit with an attack at medication for panic attacks what appears to be virtually any time. It’s only made even worse because of belief that a lot of people think they’re entirely powerless and will do nothing at all but effort to endure the extreme pain as it reaches. Probably the greatest ways you can handle and likely get rid of acute anxiety attacks is insight what points them only. Knowing what triggers your attacks, you walk around a better possibility of being correctly anxiety attack free the root cause panic symptoms and then suddenly use extracting or removing it completely from your standard of living.Fear is just about the strongest triggers of these attacks. Are you aware what you’re fearful of? Phobias are usually one well-known trigger an increasing number of social anxiety disorder buyers end up having. Subjecting a person to a indicators of panic attack phobia tends to be enough to trigger an attack. A lot of people are unaware they have phobias and this could in actual fact be the range one element that activates any attacks they also. Try to think of just what instills fear in you and enjoy if that mysteriously initiated attacks inside your previous or later on. Whenever they.”
My reaction: Well first off if you took the time to read all of that then I laugh at you. Second, apparently snow causes much anxiety in people, especially us southerners. So this comment was really very helpful. For real? SPAM
5.) Name: Zynga
Written on post: Are you as smart as me? Take this quiz to find out!
Message: “lol a handful of of the opinions folks distribute are a little out there, in some cases i wonder if they in fact read the content pages and threads before leaving your 2 cents or whether they take a moment to skim the title of the article and jot down the initial thought that drifts into their heads. anyway, it is nice to look over clever commentary from time to time in contrast to the same, old blog vomit that i constantly see on the net i’m going to enjoy a few rounds of zynga poker adios”
My reaction: Umm, dude. Seriously? “A little out there”? Umm, you are a “little out there”. Have you ever heard of grammar, puntuation…anything like that? It’s this little thing that makes it so PEOLPE CAN READ WHAT YOU WRITE. Just a suggestion. And don’t put down my commenters, for they are a lot more intelligent than you.
Capital SPAM.
You gotta love spam, huh? Oh and one more.
Name: How to win ex-girlfriend back
On post: It is the most wonderful time of the year…
Message: Great website. Great read.
How to win ex-girlfriend back…thanks for the tips.
Wowza.
Apparently, according to Taylor, global domination is quite an easy task for the brilliant of mind.(Sorry Spencer, your chances of domination just went down the toilet)
There are only, uh…14 steps to the domination thing. Let’s see if I compute.
“Global Domination is not really that hard, and I can prove it. The only real difficult part is finding the right tools. I’ll list those right now!
[Note: you don't need all of these things, they're each something you could use!]“
I must disagree with that last note, Mr. J. For one of the listed things is a book and I am quite certain that it will take more than the divine story ”Romeo & Juliet” or some other romantically challenged tale to get the world under my control. The crowbar may get me into the McDonalds cash register, but I am sure that stolen $20 will not get me domination, but into Juvenielle Hall.
-An army of Zombies (every global domination requires something to strike fear in the hearts of your victims. What better way to accomplish this than a healthy helping of the undead?)
I must agree with this statement. Zombies would be a huge, uplifting help in my quest, but I am not positive of their obedient behavior. According to Wikipedia, a zombie is a mindless being. It does take intelligence to do what is ordered, and I am worried during a battle or perhaps a speech one of them will fault.
-An army of super-soldiers (When there is a shortage of graves and mad Nazi Scientists, an army of super-soldiers easily gets the job done. Not only do they have superhuman strength, keen eyesight, and obey your every whim, they don’t fall apart at the first shotgun blast of the retaliation. Note: you should preferably go for the soldiers brought up in military training from the age of six or seven. They have more experience, and don’t have a reason to question an order)
Aha, you have noted something worthy of recognition and honor! Yes, I must say that an army of super-soldiers would be very helpful! Where can you get these?
- A crowbar (Yes, you heard me. This tool is an essential part of world domination. It can be used for beating people, prying boards off of farmer’s boarded-up windows, and general woodworking handyman tasks)
Refer to my statement above about McDonalds.
- Pepper spray/Smokescreen (How else are you gonna smoke those pesky farmers out of their basements?)
This may also come in handy if attacked by a stubborn, rabbid bunny rabbit.
- A sweet car (You need something that will get the job done. It needs to be durable, upgradable, and able to carry the weight of those Gatling guns and missile launchers you need to tote. I’m talking about…a Jeep)
Check. Got one disassmbled in the front yard. Must it be running?
- A good book (For the moments your armies of zombies and super-soldiers are attacking heavily fortified cities and farms. Those can take hours!)
I am possitive that a book will not do much damage to the world, and perhaps I may better use my time commanding the troops or using my crowbar for a little extra income.
- Toothbrush, floss, and mouthwash (Do you really think those pesky World Leaders are going to take you seriously when they see that piece of broccoli in your teeth on the ransom videos you send?)
In my case I may need a travel-sized orthodontist too.
- Tanks (boom)
Yes.
- Jets (bigger boom)
Bigger yes.
- Threat of Nuclear Fallout (potential huge boom)
I must be ready to carry out this threat, of course.
- A proper lair (the best ones are on the moon. Think about it, when you destroy the world after said domination, where else are you gonna go?)
Oh, I already have my second house and all of my pets on Mars for safe keeping. You never know what these world leaders are going to do and they may try to use my possessions against me.
- A Proper Arch Nemesis (You can’t choose just any nemesis, though. You have to choose the strongest, best, and good looking nemesis. That person is the people’s hero. Everyone needs a hero. Heroes inspire, encourage, give hope. What better way to completely drain the people’s morale by destroying their favorite hero in an epic battle? That way, no one can accuse you of being a chicken and fighting some wimp down the road!)
Do I have any volunteers?
- A minion (like Igor, but…..eviler!)
Ah yes, I have several of those. Must I name a few of them? I can think of 4 right now. Can you have four, or must you choose one? And I always have my brothers for backup.
- Some backing/support (every global dominator has some nationality backing them up, supplying them with money, resources, etc.. The most popular in today’s society are the Russians, Koreans, Nazi Cults, or whatever nations people in America deem to be “threatening.”)
Oh, I already have that.
I hoped this helped you with an idea of how to gain World Domination. But just so you know, Bungie Studios, the amazing company that created and developed such classics as Marathon and Halo, are already in the final stages of World Domination. SO you better pick up the pace!
Good luck and Peace,
Taylor J.Thank you Mr. Taylor J. I do appreciate your advice and must say that you should give it more often. I would have just written this in a comment, but I thought it to be too long and that more people would like to read it. Thanks again for your input.
Luck’s Not Real and Peace Is Lame,
Kait C.
I am very sorry to say it came from my worst enemy ever, but I did find this quote quite enjoyable and laughed quite hard at it. It is very funny to me that my worst enemy can come up with a quote like this yet can’t glue a few pictures in a box for Creative Writing.
By the way, if you are wondering who my worst enemy is you obviously don’t know me.
“So the other day I got an immense craving for a game of global domination.”
- Spencer
Cindyrella, the birthday girl, is in the middle with Samuel and Samantha on either side.
For Cinderella’s, a.k.a Christina, brithday she took a couple of her friends with her to Lamberts Cafe which is about an hour and 15 minutes away from where we live. We all met some place or another and got in the crowded van on the way to Lamberts, all except the Whites who were shopping in the town beforehand and the Butlers who were going to drive there themselves.
We all got there about the same time, well, everyone except for the Butlers who took a “Detour” and showed up an hour late.
Just pretend that there's a goofy looking dork in there somewhere. Jake was unable to make it to the picture because he was too busy taking his "detour".
Just put your hands up and yell "Roll" and pay attention; your roll is probably whizzing through the air straight toward you!
The rolls were delicious! They also brought apple butter and some sticky molasses substance to you if you wanted it!
Victoria catches me taking her picture...ahh!!!
The boys and the girls sat at different tables...and for good reasons. Look at these slobs! Them and they're unflattering manners!
No comment. It's her natural state.
I made a new friend! Samantha and I talked for a while, apparently she likes to talk about humiliating stories about her brothers. I learned a lot of truth that day. =P
Samantha
Samantha tugs on her brother's, Jake, arm...his reaction is stuttering.
Julie poses. Amazing.
We all had a lot of fun and came home with a truck load of leftovers. Thanks, Cindy, for the great experience and memories!
